| It's been quite a while. [EDITED] |
[Oct. 30th, 2009|01:57 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | explorative | ] |
[I take back the "I'm going to backdate entries that I was going to post before but obviously never did" bit. For various reasons, the main one being a major case of apathy right now.]
I now like coleslaw. And popcorn shrimp. To where I get CRAVINGS. You have no idea how weird that is for someone who's been repulsed (yet intrigued) by those particular foods her whole life. The thought of biting into a boiled shrimp still makes me squirm, but popcorn shrimp actually makes me drool. A substantial amount. Ohemgee. |
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| Caged |
[Jun. 13th, 2009|04:41 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  frustrated | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | David Cook - Light On | ] |
I'm feeling a little too caged recently, and I hope it's not just me, but my view of reality's "common sense" is not jiving well with others'. They clash. :\
Aging also seems to be going backwards lately.
I don't know if I'm completely comfortable with laughs over luxury.
Yet? Who knows. :\
School schedules are falling to craaaaaaaap...but it's my own fault. :(
My head doesn't feel like it's landed/grounded yet. I don't know if that's a good or bad thing.
I'm not actually one who's comfortable with day-by-day planning...more like week-by-week...or month-by-month...
Seriously! IS IT SO HARD OR BAD TO WANT TO PLAN AHEAD?!! :\
Case and point: I'm all mixed up. (Or is it shook up? Uh hey hey hey... ;P) |
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| Nihon |
[May. 20th, 2009|05:11 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  tired | ] |
Having come home from dropping Matt-kun off at the airport, I find that I am curiously conflicted with feelings.
On the one hand, I now know what it must have felt like for my parents to know that I was going across the Pacific for an extended (week and a half) stay in a foreign country. Without their supervision and safety.
Knowing Matt, and recalling the rough (yet wonderful) week and a half we spent in Nihon in 2007, I worry and am concerned as I believe my parents (mother) were for me that he will undoubtedly do rash things and possibly get lost. Steven-kohai being there is a slight relief, but I wouldn't put it past him to get sucked into Matt's antics and then it'd be both of them crashing and burning together.
I suppose I'm exaggerating. :\
For some reason, though, it's hard for me to keep in perspective that they'll (he'll) only be gone for 2 weeks...not months, which is what it seems to feel like. :\ A week and a half flew by for me and Matt like the long (but not really) hours of the plane ride it took to get us there.
2 weeks, I'm sure, will go by like my scholastic break between semesters is going by - all too fast. -_-;
On the other hand, however, the excitement, the joy, the emboldening feeling of returning to a country you love and have yet to fully explore is the other feeling that conflicts me. I wanted to drop everything and go with them, to experience it with them, to experience it again for myself, and to really soak in the life that is over there without the hindrance of "newness" and "foreigner" to hold me back.
It felt like the shock and excitement of going there for the first time kind of numbed the whole experience and made it completely tourist-y and superficial instead of more personal and explorative.
On the way to the airport, Matt was fiddling with his new camera/video recorder, eventually recording himself (and me!) for his new "video blogs" of his trip. He was saying that this feels like a really important trip in his life, that everything is pointing to some life-changing event and such.
This might have added to the ominous feeling I had (the one that related to parents), because there's nothing stopping him from NOT staying over there!
Quit his job, broke up with girlfriend, not going to school currently (graduated)...darn! It's a little scary (with a HINT of excitement!) to think that he could just NOT COME BACK. :(
*sigh*
I'll just have to trust him - his judgment, his spirit, his drive, his feelings, his heart.
I may be overdoing it just a little, but dude...that ominous feeling is just overwhelming me and my gut. Maybe it's jitters or something.
Maybe. :\
Other than Matt-kun and Steven-kohai going to Nihon...
I'm getting ready for summer session I and new developments.
I'll say that it hasn't been calm in a really long time. "Really" referring to before finals. Like a month before finals. Maybe more than a month. Hah.
But still, I'm expecting it maybe to FINALLY calm a little next week. This week there're parties, breakfasts, dinners, family, friends, construction, painting, paperwork, and MORE!
Oh, and all this (since the long time before finals) is still being run with MINIMAL SLEEP!!
You think that'd be a joke since it's break and all, but no! I'm a baka who likes to be sleep-deprived and throw off her internal clock for laughs and giggles.
My stuff is spilled all over the floor. I've become messy.
And heavy - mass-wise. -_-;
Will I complain like my classmates? Heck no!
Will I complain at all? Heck yes!
I understand that it's my own fault I'm the way I am now, unlike them who seem to want to blame their "gains" on school, on the program.
I try not to laugh, and scoff.
*shakes head*
Ok, WAAAAY off tangent.
I think it's the lack of sleep, and tenseness from not having a calm atmosphere.
*SIGH*
Goodnight.
We'll see about this breakfast and development.
-_-; |
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| This past weekend |
[May. 18th, 2009|07:40 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  cheerful | ] |
What is that saying? "Out of the frying pan and into the fire"??
*shrug*
That just randomly came to my mind. :P
( Some fave pictures ) |
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| Too much |
[Apr. 23rd, 2009|02:53 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  exhausted | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Amelie - Comptine D'Un Autre Ete L'Apres Midi | ] |
1. SPF 4 is not considered "protection." It's considered "you're an idiot for buying this and putting it on!"
I'M A BIG, RED, LOBSTER BAKA FOR PUTTING ON ANYTHING UNDER SPF 30 (MAYBE EVEN SPF 45!) AND FROLICKING AROUND THE POOL FOR 2.5 HRS!!
As much as it pains me to say it, MB is a big, red, lobster baka as well for HAVING that bottle!!
You know what bothers me most, though? I DIDN'T WANT TAN LINES UNTIL AT LEAST MID-MAY!! I wanted to wear dresses during the rest of the "spring" of this year. Not that I can't wear dresses now...and I'm probably going to prefer to wear tanks for a little bit...BUT TAN LINES SHOWING UNDER DRESSES (ON ME) IS JUST GROSSSSSS TO ME!!!! I. am. so. disappointed. with. myself.
Big, red, lobster BAKA. T_T
2. I haven't had my tail whooped like this in a long time. 2 more weeks!!
:(
3. I can't "take one for the team..." There doesn't seem to be one anymore. :(
4. People who have no substance to them baffle the fuzz right off of my brain. Yes, my brain has some fuzz on it.
Ok maybe not but that's the first thing that came to my mind...of fuzz. :P Ok, enough.
Seriously, though, how do some people not have SUBSTANCE in/to them?? No humor, no personality, no wit, no smarts, not even a hint of sarcasm! Holy cow, it's like, dude...I'm talking to a rock. Not even a log, a ROCK.
And no real hint of looks either to somehow dazzle a spark in people.
(I think my words are a little mixed tonight?)
5. I loathe my selfishness. It is the start of everything BAD and WRONG and DUMB.
6. Must. resist. urge. to. buy. things. with. dwindling. funds. Eek. |
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